Says Ryan, “If I had a gun for every cop I saw,

October 2, 2011 § 2 Comments

I’d have 45 thousand guns.”

And he accused ME of exaggerating about how many Cheetos Puffs I ate yesterday?

Ryan says I could live until I was 160 if I bettered my diet. But I say, “Why would I want to live that long without my Cheetos Puffs?”

Ryan shudders every time I open a Cheetos Puffs bag. Ryan’s repulsed by all the preservatives and 10 grams of fat per serving. But I say, “Seriously, though. Why would I want to live 160 years with you?” This is when it gets real quiet in the room. Except for the occasional ruffle of the bag and the crunch of the Cheetos Puffs between my teeth.

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