And there it is:

My scooter caught, parked in the faculty and staff ONLY parking. The policeman took this picture and posted it on my student account. But don’t worry. I made my appeal:

“Dear University Police/Parking Office,

I am a first-year graduate student instructor who teaches two writing courses on campus. I parked my moped in the faculty motor-vehicle parking behind the ELWC building at around 2:50pm in order to make it to my class I teach at 3:00pm in the library. I assumed (wrongly) that because I am an instructor hired and paid by BYU that I was considered staff. I realize now, after reading the parking guidelines, that I am still considered only a graduate student and that I must park only in the student motor-vehicle parking spaces. Obviously, this is an error on my part. I should have read and understood the parking guidelines beforehand. But because this is the first semester I’ve driven our moped to campus and the first time I’ve received a citation for doing so, I am hoping that you will consider repealing this citation.

Sincerely,

Tara Boyce”

Man, I’m a liar lately. This was not my first time driving my scooter to campus. And though it was my first time receiving a citation for parking my moped in faculty parking, it was not my first time receiving a citation for parking in a not-supposed-to-park-here spot. But I don’t care. Parking Police = THE MAN, which I am always fighting. If and if parking policemen end up in heaven, I will gladly go to hell to be away from them. (That’s to say I won’t already be there for lying.) I’ll throw big hellish parties there too, IN THE FACULTY PARKING LOTS, chanting “AT LEAST HERE WE CAN PARK FOR FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

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